Wednesday, December 19, 2012

The Final New Year's Resolution

  The last New Year's Resolution I made was over 30 years ago and I have kept it faithfully. Here it is: I will make no more New Year's Resolutions, and here's how come.

  Your brain will make a habit of anything you do, and you will get better at doing it whether it's positive or negative or neutral. Resolutions are your self-directed rules, and you create these rules, or structures, as a way to improve your life. If you make rules (resolutions) that you don't keep, after a while you get to be very good at breaking your own rules.

   If you keep breaking up with your boyfriend/girlfriend, you get better at it, and it becomes harder to commit to a long-lasting relationship because you practice breaking up.
   If you get angry often, then it gets easier to get angry more often because you practice getting angry.
   If you can't keep a budget and don't have much in savings, are you practicing spending money?
   If you can't lose weight, are you practicing eating and not exercising or what?
   If you can't get to the gym, is it because you practice doing other things?
   If you can't keep your resolutions, what else are you practicing and "hard-wiring" into your brain's habit zone?

   The reason that coaching works is that your coach is your partner dedicated to help you succeed. We create structures that actually work for you or else you have someone to help you modify them until they do work for you. You can't see yourself like your coach sees you. You don't have the same conversations with your friends and others like you have with your coach because your coach pushes the edges that you decide to push. To walk away from your coach is to keep your problem, to meet your challenge alone, and to find your own solutions by yourself.

   Hey, in addition to the white hat, the white horse and the silver bullets, even the Lone Ranger had Tonto. If you're going to make a resolution for 2013, do it so it will stick. Don't just keep your problem, get a success partner, call your coach.

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