Thursday, July 31, 2014

Be Happy Or…

I learned this from the Smith's at church. They have taught their children this amazing line, and if you ask either of their teenagers what their Mom says about happiness, they both repeat back verbatim:

"Happiness is a decision. Go to your room, and when you decide to be happy, you can come back out."

How many things are like this? We get grumpy, mad, difficult to get along with, gossipy, complaining, etc. What if you went to your room and didn't come out until you decided to be happy?

Yes, I know there are things that ruin our cornflakes on a daily basis, but do those things have to take all the happiness out of your life?

Really, you have an opportunity here to change the way things are. You can be a gentle force to stop the whining, stop the complaining, decide to be happy and see what positives might come your way.

Fix Your Aching Joints?

Simply amazing and cheap. Do you have creaky knees and achy joints? Here is a home remedy I'm using, but it took a few days to work. Again, this is a home remedy with no research or testing behind it.

Take a tablespoon of unflavored gelatin per day for two weeks, then a tablespoon of unflavored gelatin every other day thereafter.

I bought a box of it at the grocery store for $1.50, next to the flavored Jello gelatins. I tried it for a week and by the forth day I was bouncing up the stairs without thinking about my creaky knees. Wow. 

I put it in smoothies, on salads, in drinks—note that i stopped putting it in my hot tea because the gelatin kept coating the hot spoon. After a week, I bought a one-pound box of this stuff on Amazon.com, and instead of doing a tbsp every other day, I sprinkle some on my scrambled egg each morning just before it's done cooking. So far, so good.

If you'd like some other home remedy ideas, take a look at http://pandemicsurvivor.com/

Your Money Is Your Life

Some of you know that I have been studying how money works. We have a fiat money system (not tied to anything of value like gold or silver) that is backed by debt and the faith and credit of the United States. What is the value of money, and why do we need the debt?

In essence, we have already agreed that the value of a dollar is whatever we agree it is to buy our groceries, pay the rent and fulfill our debts and obligations.

Today it doesn’t really matter that our money be tied to gold or anything else. Your paycheck represents your labor, your life and what you had to give of yourself to get something back that we call a dollar. Isn’t this the true value of money? It represents your life.

Two links.
Free lessons and analysis on money debt, energy and other issues, how they relate and the problems:
  
http://www.peakprosperity.com/crashcourse

Article from Forbes.com on ability of the Treasury to produce debt-free money and reducing national debt (I don't think we have enough gold to follow that part of this article):
http://www.forbes.com/sites/cedricmuhammad/2013/10/08/debt-ceiling-memo-to-tea-party-federal-reserve-debt-monetization-far-more-dangerous-than-obamacare/

Sunday, June 1, 2014

The Official 10 Cowboy Ethics

The Center for Cowboy Ethics and Leadership promotes the following ten principles to live by. I believe these are good guidelines for everybody and every organization.
1. Live each day with courage

2. Take pride in your work

3. Always finish what you start

4. Do what has to be done

5. Be tough, but fair

6. When you make a promise, keep it

7. Ride for the brand

8. Talk less and say more

9. Remember that some things aren’t for sale

10. Know where to draw the line.

The Center not only provides support to adults of all walks of life, it has also developed a program to inspire children to “do the right thing ~ the cowboy way.” Based on the Ten Principles of the Code of the West, they have a four-week unit that helps high school students build the personal qualities they will need to achieve true career and life success.
http://cowboyethics.org/

Attraction Factor 16: Show Others How to Please You

Do you ever hope that other people will treat you like you want to be treated? Have you ever thought about teaching them how to please you so that they don’t have to guess? Have you ever wished that someone would just tell you so YOU wouldn’t have to guess wrong?

Here is a great list of 7 things that can really impact your relationships and help people treat you like you want to be treated. I know some of these can be very sensitive for some people, so think about how these can be important to you, or maybe how a relationship suffered because you didn’t realize their importance to someone else.

1. Train people how to listen to you. How do you need to be heard in terms of your words, feelings and feedback? Do you want them just to listen, or do you want an action-response? How will you feel that you've been heard?

2. Show people how to physically touch you. People like various personal distance from others while some don’t like to be touched at all. Some prefer big hugs while some prefer a handshake. Let people know.

3. Teach people how to show they care. Would you like a letter, call, visit, gift, surprise? How will they know for sure if you don’t teach them? Kindness unwanted is not kindness.

4. Show people how to respond to you. What to say or do. How to say or do it. What tone of voice to use. How to get your permission for the proper way to respond to you and not overstep?

5. Tell people what you need from them before it becomes a problem. Do you need more time, less time? More respect, sensitivity, acceptance? Less criticism, pickiness, negativity?

6. Inform people how to reach you in a way that help you to say yes. Do you need to know features, benefits, function, value, quality, long-tern analysis and details?

7. Tell people the shift or fundamental change in attitude you want or need from them. From negative to positive. From closed to open. From unwilling to willing. From fixated to free. From righteous to humble. From acquiring to gratitude. From seeking to enjoying.

There is always the question of: What if they don’t treat me like I ask them to treat me? Sometimes it might just be time to move along. One thing is for sure, if you’re not getting what you want, and if you don’t ask, then the answer is automatically, “No.”

Friday, May 2, 2014

The Folded Napkin…A Truckers Story

This story is about how we want to see someone who will work hard and do their best against all odds, and how we will rally around to support them. Amidst all the bad things we hear about, there is still a lot of good to be done by people of goodwill. People of good will need each other.

The Folded Napkin…A Truckers Story
Author Unknown

I try not to be biased, but I had my doubts about hiring Stevie. His placement counselor assured me that he would be a good, reliable busboy. But I had never had a mentally handicapped employee and wasn't sure I wanted one.

I wasn't sure how my customers would react to Stevie. He was short, a little dumpy with the smooth facial features and thick-tongued speech of Downs Syndrome. I wasn't worried about most of my trucker customers because truckers don't generally care who buses tables as long as the meatloaf platter is good and the pies are homemade.

The four-wheeler drivers were not the ones who concerned me; the mouthy college kids traveling to school; the yuppie snobs who secretly polish their silverware with their napkins for fear of catching some dreaded "truck stop germ," the pairs of white-shirted business men on expense accounts who think every truck stop waitress wants to be flirted with. I knew those people would be uncomfortable around Stevie so I closely watched him for the first few weeks.

I shouldn't have worried. After the first week, Stevie had my staff wrapped around his stubby little finger, and within a month my truck regulars had adopted him as their official truck stop mascot.

After that, I really didn't care what the rest of the customers thought of him. He was like a 21-year-old kid in blue jeans and Nikes, eager to laugh and eager to please, but fierce in his attention to his duties. Every salt and pepper shaker was exactly in its place, not a bread crumb or coffee spill was visible when Stevie got done with the table.

Our only problem was persuading him to wait to clean a table until after the customers were finished. He would hover in the background, shifting his weight from one foot to the other, scanning the dining room until a table was empty. Then he would scurry to the empty table and carefully bus dishes and glasses onto his cart and meticulously wipe the table up with a practiced flourish of his rag. If he thought a customer was watching, his brow would pucker with added concentration. He took pride in doing his job exactly right, and you had to love how hard he tried to please each and every person he met.

Over time, we learned that he lived with his mother, a widow who was disabled after repeated surgeries for cancer. They lived on their Social Security benefits in public housing two miles from the truck stop.

Their social worker, who stopped to check on him every so often, admitted they had fallen between the cracks. Money was tight, and what I paid him was probably the difference between them being able to live together and Stevie being sent to a group home. That's why the restaurant was a gloomy place that morning last August, the first morning in three years that Stevie missed work.

He was at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester getting a new valve or something put in his heart. His social worker said that people with Downs Syndrome often have heart problems at an early age so this wasn't unexpected, and there was a good chance he would come through the surgery in good shape and be back at work in a few months.

A ripple of excitement ran through the staff later that morning when word came that he was out of surgery, in recovery, and doing fine. Frannie, the head waitress, let out a war hoop and did a little dance in the aisle when she heard the good news. Marvin Ringers, one of our regular trucker customers, stared at the sight of this 50-year-old grandmother of four doing a victory shimmy beside his table. Frannie blushed, smoothed her apron and shot Marvin a withering look.

He grinned. "OK, Frannie, what was that all about?" he asked.
"We just got word that Stevie is out of surgery and going to be okay."
"I was wondering where he was. I had a new joke to tell him. What was the surgery about?"

Frannie quickly told Marvin and the other two drivers sitting at his booth about Stevie's surgery, then sighed: " Yeah, I'm glad he is going to be OK," she said. "But I don't know how he and his Mom are going to handle all the bills. From what I hear, they're barely getting by as it is."

Marvin nodded thoughtfully, and Frannie hurried off to wait on the rest of her tables. Since I hadn't had time to round up a busboy to replace Stevie and really didn't want to replace him, the girls were busing their own tables that day until we decided what to do.

After the morning rush, Frannie walked into my office. She had a couple of paper napkins in her hand and a funny look on her face. "What's up?" I asked.

"I didn't get that table where Marvin and his friends were sitting cleared off after they left, and Pete and Tony were sitting there when I got back to clean it off," she said. "This was folded and tucked under a coffee cup."

She handed the napkin to me, and three $20 bills fell onto my desk when I opened it. On the outside, in big, bold letters, was printed "Something For Stevie."

"Pete asked me what that was all about," she said, "so I told him about Stevie and his Mom and everything, and Pete looked at Tony and Tony looked at Pete, and they ended up giving me this."

She handed me another paper napkin that had "Something For Stevie"scrawled on its outside. Two $50 bills were tucked with in its folds. Frannie looked at me with wet, shiny eyes, shook her head and said simply: "Truckers."

That was three months ago. Today is Thanksgiving, the first day Stevie is supposed to be back to work. His placement worker said he's been counting the days until the doctor said he could work, and it didn't matter at all that it was a holiday. He called 10 times in the past week, making sure we knew he was coming, fearful that we had forgotten him or that his job was in jeopardy. I arranged to have his mother bring him to work. I then met them in the parking lot and invited them both to celebrate his day back.

Stevie was thinner and paler, but couldn't stop grinning as he pushed through the doors and headed for the back room where his apron and busing cart were waiting. "Hold up there, Stevie, not so fast," I said. I took him and his mother by their arms. "Work can wait for a minute. To celebrate your coming back, breakfast for you and your mother is on me!" I led them toward a large corner booth at the rear of the room.

I could feel and hear the rest of the staff following behind as we marched through the dining room. Glancing over my shoulder, I saw booth after booth of grinning truckers joining the procession. We stopped in front of the big table. Its surface was covered with coffee cups, saucers and dinner plates, all sitting slightly crooked on dozens of folded paper napkins. "First thing you have to do, Stevie, is clean up this mess," I said. I tried to sound stern.

Stevie looked at me, and then at his mother, then pulled out one of the napkins. It had "Something for Stevie" printed on the outside. As he picked it up, two $10 bills fell onto the table. Stevie stared at the money, then at all the napkins peeking from beneath the tableware, each with his name printed or scrawled on it. I turned to his mother.

"There's more than $10,000 in cash and checks on that table, all from truckers and trucking companies that heard about your problems. 'Happy Thanksgiving.'"

Well, it got real noisy about that time, with everybody hollering and shouting, and there were a few tears, as well. But you know what's funny? While everybody else was busy shaking hands and hugging each other, Stevie, with a big smile on his face, was busy clearing all the cups and dishes from the table.

Best worker I ever hired.
Plant a seed and watch it grow.
=====

Sometimes you find a good story that comes out of nowhere, fact or fiction doesn't matter, it's still a good story. I found this one on a friend's FaceBook page. I hope it help you through your day too!

Thursday, May 1, 2014

Attraction Factor 15: Tolerate Nothing

When you put up with something, it costs you in time, money, resources and brain time. Costs are not attractive. If you consider that you have about 240 work days a year, tolerating something for just 10-minutes per workday equals a whole week per year.

We tolerate things for very good reasons. As you grew up you were told not to be so selfish; to cope, accept, be patient, wait your turn, be understanding, look on the bright side, work it out, compromise, make do, etc. Unfortunately, most of us learned these skills to our own detriment and we put up with too much. Isn’t it time to learn how to stop tolerating the things that no longer work and things that are not good for you?

You might have a good reason for tolerating things in your life. Examine those reasons how come you put up with old technology, bad relationships, a job that doesn’t really feed your soul and things that hold you down. Start changing the simple ones where you have total control and little or no risk, like cleaning out your desk drawer.

Consider the risks in making changes that are outside your total control. How will you tell your supervisor to stop disrespecting you in this or that way? How will you get your family to stop interrupting when you speak? How will you communicate your new boundaries and how you will respond when someone crosses those boundaries? Will you risk losing a job, friend or family when you make the changes you need to make?

In making a list of everything you tolerate, start with the favorite room in your home and expand to your whole house, yard, work, friends, family, etc. See which things you can change without risk, and strategize which others are worth the risk to change. As you stop tolerating the little things, you are practicing up for eliminating the bigger things.

Monday, March 31, 2014

My New Book: Work As Worship: How Do You Practice Your Faith in Christ at Work

Many of us experience the tension between our job culture and the daily practice of our faith. The workplace environment focuses on getting the work done and respecting the beliefs of others such that we can often be uncomfortable sharing our faith and offering the love of Christ to our co-workers. You could say that in addition to job training, the workplace often trains us to keep our faith to ourselves.

This book began as a brief presentation to encourage Christians to engage their work as a form of worship—doing everything heartily as unto the Lord. The message hit home with many of the attenders: it’s about retraining ourselves to practice our faith when at work. If Christ is the context for our whole lives, isn’t life about being and practicing who we really are in Christ, even when at work?

How do we respect others, obey the rules and embrace that of Christ within us while on the job? How do we take an attitude of worship to our work? How do we clarify our standards in Christ, and then set boundaries to maintain those standards?

Sometimes a book will help. Sometimes we need someone to come along side us and offer assistance. Always we need Christ as our Savior and the Holy Spirit as our Teacher. May this book be a help on your journey.


Available at Amazon.com:
http://www.amazon.com/Work-Worship-Practice-Faith-Christ/dp/0991179102/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1396291234&sr=8-1&keywords=mack+arrington

Attraction Principle #14: God Is in the Details

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I carry a horseshoe nail with me in my change purse and often quote the following poem:
For the Want of a Horseshoe Nail with my own ending.

For the want of a nail the shoe was lost,
For the want of a shoe the horse was lost,
For the want of a horse the rider was lost,
For the want of a rider the battle was lost,
For the want of a battle the kingdom was lost,
And all for the want of a horse-shoe nail.

Now, why didn’t they put a nail in the shoe
And save the horse and the rider too
And win the battle and save the king?
I guess it was just the same old thing:
Dumb details.

The difference between success and failure in life is often the difference in knowing which details are critically important and which are not so much. A wink can be a small detail, but can communicate so much depending on the winker and the context. Last week I noticed someone pulling out of a parking place with a flat tire—and was able to stop them before the tire was shredded to pieces. Creases in your ear lobes can indicate you have a heart problem. A tablespoon of non-flavored gelatin in your smoothie or food every couple of days can relieve painful joints and help regenerate cartilage. I have a special juice recipe that cleaned the plaque out of my blood vessels in about 13 months. These and many more details can mean life and death.

I’d also like to point out that entrepreneurs get rich on details that nobody else notices. One man noticed that operating rooms needed a simple way to maintain heated fluids needed by a patient during surgery. One teenager thought his grandmother’s jam recipe was really good and started canning and selling jam, another teenager invented “fish flops” beach shoes. Each created multimillion dollar businesses (the teenagers too!) based on noticing details.

Subtleties, details and nuances are more attractive than the obvious. Stephanie takes incredible photographs, the more I look at them, the more I see the details and composition she has mastered. People can be like this too. How many people do you know without really knowing them? How about the waiter at your favorite restaurant, or the repair person who fixes your appliance? Is the executive an expert woodcarver, the plumber a poet and the tree expert a master of chain saw art?

In the creation of life, love and laughter, God is in the details. Which details do you notice? Which ones will you start noticing?

Nobody sees a flower really; it is so small. We haven't time, and to see takes time…like to have a friend takes time. --Georgia O'Keefe

Friday, February 28, 2014

Teenage Millionaires

Trends indicate that our future, possibly our survival and sustainability, will hinge upon the entrepreneurs who are perceptive enough to see a problem or need, smart enough to formulate a solution and who are courageous enough to risk doing something about it.

Research is being focused on how to identify true entrepreneurs and on how to expedite their development and support their success. In studying the characteristics of true entrepreneurs, I happened upon several web sites reporting about teenage millionaires.

Examples:
  • Over $1 Million In Sales For The 15-Year-Old Entrepreneur Behind Fish Flops beach wear. Madison Robinson has sold 60,000 pairs of her Fish Flops flip flops for $25 apiece.
  • Nick D'Aloisio at 17 -- a prodigy app developer -- sold his news summarization app, Summly, to Yahoo! for $30 million. He is now a full time employee at the company.
  • Brian Wong, hired to run business development at Digg (at age 19), Wong went on to found mobile rewards network called Kiip that proved a game-changer in mobile advertising. So far the company has taken in over $15 million in capital investment.
  • Cameron Johnson started his first business at age 9, making invitations for his family's parties. Several businesses later -- selling Beanie Babies, internet ad space and greeting cards -- and his net worth had surpassed the $1 million mark before he'd finished high school.
  • Fraser Doherty, CEO of Super Jam. This Scottish young star started producing jam and selling it in the neighborhood. He left school at the age of 16 to fully concentrate on super jam and had sales of over 1.2 million dollars in 2011.
  • Ashley Qualls, an America entrepreneur who made her first million at the age of seventeen. She took an 8 dollar loan from her mother and created whateverlife.com in 2004.The website focused on providing HTML tutorials for young people and providing free My space layouts. Ashley Qualls is valued to have a net worth of 8 million dollars.
  • Farrah Gray started selling body lotion at the age of 6.  At 13 years old he founded Farr-Out Food which in a period of one year had received food orders of over 1.5 million dollars making him a millionaire at 14. Farrah Gray is the youngest person to have a Wall Street office and is estimated to be worth 20 million dollars.

Here we have teens who made their millions with beach motif flip flops, Granny’s jam recipe, body lotion, greeting cards, and of course—computer stuff.

They’re kids. If they can do it, why not you?

Attraction Factor 13: Get Your Personal Needs Met

Have you ever met someone who was emotionally VERY needy? It could be someone who invited themselves into your life, or who keeps showing up whenever they have problems. You might consider: 

  • Unmet needs consume 25-90% of life.
  • Your needs will run your life.
  • If you are needy, you attract needy people.
  • Increasing your integrity reduces your needs automatically.

You have two kinds of needs. Survival Needs include water, food, shelter and (to a degree) love. Personal Needs include whatever is necessary to be your best and move forward in life such as inspiration, information, support, solutions, focus, people, character and so forth.

People do not get their needs met for several reasons. First, they don't know what their needs actually are (maybe they have a general idea). Second, when in touch with their needs, they aren't comfortable or confident to REALLY get them met. Third, when they do get them met, they only get them met temporarily, not permanently.

Needs are not optional, yet we often treat them that way. If your body is starving, food isn't an option—it's a Need. The same is true if you have a Personal/Emotional Need. For you to be you, you MUST get this Need satisfied. It's not optional. Someone who has unmet needs simply isn't going to be very attractive for very long. The challenge is to identify your needs clearly, then figure out how to get them met permanently. What is it you need?

Saturday, February 1, 2014

What Level of Conversation Is Best for You Here?


In reading Quiet Leadership by David Rock, he poses that there are only five levels to use to think about or communicate about any project. He refers to this as the Choose Your Focus model, and I am shameless in adding a sixth level which I call Agreements. Here are the six levels.
Agreements. How will we work together? In building or negotiating a relationship, we must agree on how we will work together. What are our ground rules of respect and our expectations of each other? We can agree not to discuss our work outside our work group. We can agree what topics and activities are included or excluded. We can agree how we will deal with emotional issues together. We can agree on how we will disagree with each other. If we don’t set some agreements, our relationship can fall into chaos and accomplish nothing.
Vision. What do we want to create? Without a vision to focus and unify our efforts, people tend to go off in their own different directions and squander time, money and other resources. In creating a vision we want to answer, “Why are we here and what are we doing?” What is the overall thing we want to accomplish? What if it is to bring a new product to market? What if it is to build a fantastic relationship with someone you love?
Planning. How we will create it? Thinking about how we are going to bring the vision into reality, some might call this the strategy level. This is a higher level process that does not deal with the details yet. In answering this question to create a new product, our plan might call for researching a market, cost analysis, and finding funding. In building a fantastic relationship, our plan might call for taking a personality test, and finding some work things and some fun things to do together.
Details. How will we identify and act on the elements of the plan? Some might call this the tactical level where we can get bogged down if not careful. For our new product, we might need to specify what kind of research, who will do the analysis and where will we find funding. For our fantastic relationship, we might need a personality test that includes our sense of mission in life, the kind of work we enjoy and some of the games we like to play.
Problems. What is going wrong? Focusing on the problems tends to take more time and energy than focusing on the solution. Is it best to focus on all the reasons why our new product won’t work, or focus on what will make it work? Is it best to focus on all the ways our relationship is bad, or possible solutions to make it good?
Drama. Are we dealing with emotional charge? Things can get emotional without warning, and when emotions run high, progress can run low. Did the company cancel our product and you feel angry? Do you need to take a break to let things settle? In the relationship, did someone cancel dinner plans for the third time in a row and you’re feeling abandoned? What agreements did you make and apply that will allow you to be kind with emotions?
It can be extremely helpful to recognize and choose your level of focus. I admit these are my interpretations of the levels of focus from my coaching perspective. I also recommend the David Rock book on Quiet Leadership, it covers more than leadership. It includes ways of inviting more sanity into our lives.

Attraction Factor 12: Eliminate Delay

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As a consumer, are you helping to eradicate delay as a source of waste or inefficiency in business? Do you avoid the waste of waiting in long lines, going through “middlemen,” staying on “hold” for the next customer service rep?
Eliminating delay is attractive. Delay is an unnecessary expense in this day of efficiency and effectiveness, and whoever can eliminate delay tends to attract your business.
What would it be like to deal only with vendors or people who will respond immediately to what you want? What if you only dealt with firms offering a web site, online ordering and overnight delivery? What if you simply kept changing your suppliers until you found someone who didn’t waste your time?
What if you became that type of person? How attractive would you become if you eliminated delay in the products and services you offer in your business, or in how quickly you respond to friends?
Yes, I know sometimes we simply need to take care of ourselves, unplug, kick back and slow down. Yet think about this: when people respond quickly, trust expands without you having to do anything else. People fear that delay means they have been forgotten, and we are reassured by immediate responses. This alone can make you a lot more attractive to yourself and to others.
How can you eliminate delay in your life (and live more sanely)—whether from others or yourself?

Thursday, January 2, 2014

The Acknowledgement You Need

“Let me put this bluntly once more for the sake of clarity:
People get, on average, a couple of minutes of positive feedback each year, versus thousands of hours of negative feedback.” —David Rock, Quiet Leadership


The writer shared about losing a new pair of glasses, and how he was so hard on himself for losing them—self-criticism—he calculated that at least 300 times he said to himself, “You’re an idiot.” Then he did some investigating and found that other people do the same thing. Hey, you out there who is reading this, do YOU criticize yourself?

It’s one thing to take note that you need to improve and figure how you can do so. It’s another thing altogether to criticize yourself and not give yourself a chance to win. I teach a class at CoachU.com on acknowledging your positives with truth, respect and constructiveness. I point out that where excellence is expected, it is not acknowledged. This often gets the question, “Why should I tell someone they are dong a great job when they are just doing what they are supposed to do?” It’s because something happens in your brain when someone acknowledges you are doing a good job and they back it up with an example or two. Something happens in your relationships and your performance when you have a sense of respect and support for each other in this way. Something wonderful happens when you can acknowledge the positives that ARE in yourself.
 
Do you criticize yourself?
Stop that. Instead, look at how you can improve and do something to help your self.

Do you get “down” on yourself for not doing things right? Stop that. Instead, look for the things you do right and well. Focus on your strengths.

Do you allow others to criticize you in ways that are not truthful, respectful and constructive? Stop that. We have to teach people how to treat us. How will you politely teach them to treat you better, and if not, how will you choose to move on in your life?

Do you want or need more positive acknowledgement? Sometimes you have to ask for the kind of critique you want. Some personality “types” of people really need to know they are doing the job right, other types will get angry if they sense you are letting them do the job wrong and don’t say something. Ask for what you want, and also for how you want it, e.g. “I would like to have a performance evaluation, and a supportive discussion to strategize on how to improve what I already do well and also how to improve the things I don’t do well.”

Sometimes the truth we receive from others or ourselves is not the truth. Yes, sometimes I do stupid things, but I know in my knower that I am not a stupid man. Sometimes I make errors, but I am not error-prone. Sometimes I am slow to catch-on, but I am pretty smart. What about you?

Attraction Factor 11: Create a Vacuum to Pull You Forward

Have you noticed that life can get pushy? Most of us do not like to be pushed, and we tend not to like people we see as pushy. There are times when you have to meet a deadline, you have to get that job done, and doggone it, where did all the time go??? Push is generally not attractive.

On the other hand, don’t you like the pull of something good cooking in the kitchen? What about that hobby or new game you’re learning? There are things that pull us delightfully into action. In this sense, pull is very attractive!

What would pull you forward?     
Is it your faith, family, community, work, your self and things you want to do? Is it a passion for something interesting, fun or that can make money? Is it writing down your bucket list or your goals and then “git ‘er done?” What do you feel drawn to be, do or have? (If nothing comes to mind, call me asap.)

How come this, whatever it is, pulls you? Who are you for right now, and who will you become when you fully respond to this pull?

Can you verbalize this pull in a way that creates a vision for your life? There is a difference between doing your job vs helping your company succeed so that everyone can have a job. There is a difference between being a carpenter vs being a home builder. There is a difference between me being a coach vs being a life-builder assisting people to bring out their greatness and wisdom for building their lives. How about you?

How will you support your forward pull? Do you put yourself in situations where you can act on what pulls you? Do you have friends and colleagues who bring out your best? Are there others on the same or similar path? If not, how will you start clarifying and yielding to your pull?

Respond. How will you unhook yourself from who you were so that moving forward will be more true to your self? Stop defining your self by your limitations, redefine your self by your potential! As you discover a new truth about your self, speak this truth to yourself and others that you trust, stop the pushing and respond to your forward pull.